New Life LIVE: August 21, 2026

New Life: Hello, everyone. It is Friday, and I am so glad to be here. I am glad to be here on every Friday. I hope you are, too. I am joined by JJ West, a marriage and family therapist, as well as Mark Cameron, who is also a marriage and family therapist. These guys have been helping so many people for so many years, and I am so grateful that they are part of our New Life team of co-hosts. Today, I want to know, JJ, what is on your mind?
JJ West: What is on your mind is a story that I often share at the end of every Every Man’s Battle, and I talk about Joseph. Many of us are familiar with Joseph’s story. At the end of the story, at the end of Genesis, chapter 50, when he finally revealed his true identity to his brothers, they went and got Dad and brought Israel to Egypt. They are all living there, and then right after Dad dies, the brothers come up with another lie. They say to Joseph, “Hey, before Dad died, he said that you should forgive us.” Now, we have no record that Dad ever said that, but they are still scheming. Joseph, in the midst of this, says to his brothers, “What you intended for evil, God intended for good for the saving of many lives.” When you think about his story, what was included in Joseph’s story? There was jealousy, lies, abuse, slavery, false accusation, and imprisonment. There was waiting and waiting and waiting. There was famine. All of these negative things that happened in Joseph’s life, God turned into something good. Why? Well, one, because of God’s goodness and, two, because of Joseph’s faithful response. He was a righteous man. He didn’t give in to the temptations that were around him. He was also prepared and generous. He was prepared when the opportunity came for him to lead the gathering and redistribution of the grain in Egypt. He had a plan in place. Notice the plan. He says, “Let’s save 20 percent of the crops.” The bounty was going to last for seven years, and the famine was going to last for seven years. Why not one-seventh? That would get us through, right? But it is because there needed to be also something to share with others. The famine was so widespread that other countries needed to come and get grain from Egypt. So there is a need to think ahead but also to be generous, to give from the bounty. That is what we see over and over in scripture, that God says, “I will bless you in order for you then to be a blessing.” When he blesses us, it is not just a blessing in the things that we think, like more money, bigger houses and cars, better jobs, or whatever. Sometimes the blessing is that I will sustain you through the suffering and bring about something beautiful on the other end.
New Life: I love that. That is straight out of Genesis, Genesis 12:2 and 3, where God tells Abraham, “I will bless you, and you will be a blessing.” You have just blessed us, JJ, and it is a reminder to all of us that we always have something to grow through and to experience a new life. We are grateful to be here to be able to help people do that. I know that you do that every month at Every Man’s Battle. So many men have found their new lives, and their families have been blessed by that. Thank you for that word, JJ. We are going to go right to the calls. I am going to talk to Lamont after the break here. You are listening to New Life LIVE. We are helping you just by listening. We are grateful that you are here. We will be right back. We are back, and we are taking your calls at 1-800-229-3000 right now. We are going to go to Lamont, who is calling us from Los Angeles, California. He listens and watches us on YouTube. If you are watching on YouTube, click that like and subscribe button. It helps get the word out. Right now, I want to hear from you, Lamont. Thanks for calling. How can we help you?
Lamont: I am struggling with accepting all of me. I am finished with this struggle, but shame just comes over me for the things that I guess that I don't know. When I look at it, I don't know because I wasn't taught. I am struggling with that so I can move forward in my life. I am just trying to see how you overcome that.
New Life: I love that you are asking the question, Lamont. Mark, let’s start with you.
Mark Cameron: That is a very vulnerable statement you are making here, Lamont. I want you to know that I struggle at times, too, with acceptance. I think about the ways that I mess up, and I beat myself up in my head. I think a lot of people do that. In fact, I would go as far as saying that every single person at some point struggles with shame. The healing comes by identifying that it is shame that we are dealing with, which is good that you are identifying that. Where does that come from in our lives? Where does that come from for you, that shame? What I find often when people have a lot of shame is that growing up, they experienced shameful messages. Is any of that true for you?
Lamont: No, I think it is more that I have answers for others, but I don't have answers for myself. I think that makes me feel shame, that I can’t answer my own questions, but I have answers for somebody else.
Mark Cameron: How would you have answers for others but not for yourself? Help me understand that a little bit more.
Lamont: I think I was more of a listener to a lot of older people for wisdom. I was always told I was a good kid, but I never applied any of that wisdom to myself. The moment I saw an opportunity to give somebody some advice, I used that wisdom for them, but I never applied it to myself.
Mark Cameron: You just gave me a little bit of insight here, that you have been trained to be a listener. You have been trained to be a helper. You got the message growing up. You said this, “I was told I was the good kid.” When you hear that over and over and over again, it becomes an assignment to you. Then if you mess up, it is like, “I am not the good kid anymore. This means I am being bad. I am getting it wrong. I don’t know what I am doing.” That is where shame creeps in. I think that there is obviously a bigger story to this here, but I think that is where shame is coming for you. It is feeling bad, feeling shame over a struggle. Every one of us struggles in life. That is actually part of growth. The Bible says iron sharpens iron. Well, that sharpening process has to do with friction, a lot of friction. A big part of how we grow is through making mistakes. Yes, we want to learn from our mistakes, but nobody has ever been perfect their whole life aside from Jesus. People who have grown and become wise, it is because they have learned from either their own mistakes or the mistakes of others, and primarily too from their own mistakes because everybody makes mistakes. What I am hearing for you, though, is it is hard for you to accept your own mistakes, and then the shame is coming in, and then that is consuming you. Is that right?
Lamont: Yes.
Mark Cameron: Are you in therapy at all, Lamont?
Lamont: I was. I have been to therapy a few times. They always told me that I need to make time for myself and I need to learn how to say no with a smile. Those things are just hard for me to do.
Mark Cameron: That is your work. We all have hard stuff to do. If I were to guess, I would say that you have a people-pleaser attachment style. We learn it. We pick it up from our parents. Our attachment is our bonding style, and we either learn the same bonding style that is modeled for us, or we learn a bonding style to deal with how that parent is meeting our needs. You have learned that bonding style from your mom. While there are some good qualities about being kind and easygoing, we need to learn just as much who we are as a me, as well as who we are as a we in relationship with others. What are my likes? What are my preferences? How do I push back? How do I learn to say no? How do I stand up and advocate for myself? That is the hard part. Growth is hard. The nature of growth is uncomfortable, and often it is painful. We grow by learning to do the thing that reconditions us, and often we need help. We need a coach to coach us through that, but it is in that existential process that we heal.
New Life: I love that, and I am thinking the therapist probably would be good to have that attachment theory to move towards secure attachment. But I would love to hear JJ. What would you add to Lamont’s internal conversation that he is having?
JJ West: Part of the internal conversation needs to be learning to differentiate between guilt and shame. Guilt is an emotional response that attaches to our behavior. Sometimes I feel sad about my behavior, sometimes I feel angry about my behavior, and sometimes I feel guilty about my behavior. Shame, on the other hand, attacks my identity. Guilt is dealing with what I have done, and shame is who I am. Guilt would say, “I made a mistake.” Shame says, “I am a mistake.” Guilt says, “I did something wrong.” Shame says, “There is something wrong with me.” When you start to live in this toxic, binding shame that says there is something wrong with me, I am a mistake, I have blown it, or I am no good, what we tend to do then is we isolate. We withdraw from God and from others, and even from our own hearts. It is like we don’t even want to really look at our own hearts. We don’t even want to look at ourselves in the mirror. That keeps us from the very thing that God has established as our healing. God brings healing through redemptive relationship with him and with others in our lives and understanding our own heart. What we want to do is shift away from shame. We still feel guilt, but we want to move toward conviction. When you look in scripture, you will see the word shame show up again and again, but it is talking about conviction, which is rightly believing that I need to repent. I need to change not only my behavior—that 180-degree turn and living differently so I don’t just hear the advice, but I actually apply it, where I am not just a hearer of the word, I am a doer of the word—I need to change my behavior, but I also have to change the way I think. That is also part of repentance. Jesus did this all the time when he was walking around on the planet. He says, “You used to think that adultery was sleeping with your neighbor’s wife, but I need you to rethink the way you think about adultery. If you have lust in your heart, you are just as guilty.” We need to change our behavior, we need to change our thinking, and finally, repentance involves the heart. Where are my affections? When I truly experience repentance, I begin to experience this revulsion toward the things that are antithetical to God. I move away from those things. I want to develop that heart, and that comes from devoting my affection and my attention to God. When I do those things on a regular basis, I am starting to practice repentance, and I am experiencing conviction that leads to repentance that draws me into relationship rather than the toxic binding shame that causes me to run away from relationship to hide and tends to then invite me to just repeat the same broken behaviors that have led to my shame in the first place. I would encourage you, Lamont, keep doing this good work of digging through your therapy. If you have some good friends who also know the Lord, who can form a support group and accountability, I think that would be important. If you don't have one there, consider joining one of the New Life groups in order to have that ongoing support so you are not just trying to do this alone.
New Life: I love that. When you talk about guilt versus shame, Lamont, one question that you can ask yourself is, “Is this true?” We have these self-condemning ideas about ourselves. Is it true? That is where we can decide between that guilt and shame. Even to what you are talking about, Mark, having that secure connection, we can continue to be able to be our true selves but not live in that condemning thought process. I hope that helps you, Lamont, and we can connect you with a therapist that has that attachment theory as part of their specialization. I think it can walk you towards that freedom. We are so grateful that you called. We are going to go back to the calls and talk with Nancy, who is calling us from Montgomery, Texas. She listens to us on the internet. Hello, Nancy. Thanks for waiting. How can we help you today?
Nancy: In late 2022 to 2023, my neighbor’s dogs were barking four months nonstop, 24 hours. I asked her nicely and I asked her again, probably asked her a couple more times, and she responded to me nastily. I called the police to ask them a question. They came out because they were training two deputies. I didn’t ask them to come here. They suggested that I call animal control, so I did. Then what happened, what I found out recently, and this is why it is all come up again, is not getting revenge but not being reactive because I don't want to argue with my neighbor. I said, “Look, I don't have anything against you.” We met at the laundry room and she goes, “I don't like you because you made me almost lose my kids.” Here in Texas, there is a link that if you are neglecting your animals, you might be neglecting your kids. I didn’t know that at the time. I just wanted to sleep. My question is, in my head, my style is that if I didn’t do anything to you, then I don't have to apologize. If I did do something, I should feel guilty for it, but that has come up. It went all the way back recently, too, because I look at myself all the time first, to my parents’ separation. It is just very intricate, but I just want to know why it is rolling in my head a lot, not to mention that we live next door to each other and she doesn't talk to me. Then she has got all her flying monkeys, too, attacking me from afar because I did that.
New Life: Who are her flying monkeys, Nancy?
Nancy: People on her side. She manipulated them to be on her side. They are other people in the community, yes, because we are in a little cul-de-sac. It is too close for comfort. Then the lady next door moved in four months later because the dogs were barking for four months and I didn’t call anyone until after four months. That is how much patience I have. Then what happened is she moved into number one, and she enabled the whole thing. They picked up dog excrement. They did everything because they claimed that--
New Life: We are going to go to a break, Nancy, but we can hear the music. Life at home has not felt safe for a while for you, and you feel bad about it, but you are trying to do the right thing. You are not trying to take revenge, you just want to have peace and quiet in your own home. It is hard. These are the things of life, and we will help you as best we can, Nancy, on the other side of this break. You are listening to New Life LIVE. We will be right back. Welcome back. We are talking with Nancy, who has had some challenges with neighbors. Dogs barking for months on end. When she finally takes a step towards a resolution, it blows up, and it gets worse for her. Nancy, it is hard when you are trying to do the right thing and now you are feeling guilty and you really didn’t do anything wrong. Let’s hear what Mark and JJ have to say. We will start with you, Mark.
Mark Cameron: This is a really difficult situation, Nancy, especially because it is happening right there in your backyard, so to speak. It is one thing when something happens at work or in another environment, but it is another when you have to go home and you have to face things happening in a place that is supposed to be peaceful for you. What I heard you say is that you are feeling responsible for the consequence for this lady because you called in. You were patient, you called in, and then because it was linked, like you said there was that law in Texas where it is linked that if you might be neglecting your dogs, you may be neglecting your kids. What I heard from you is that you feel bad about that, and you, growing up, were assigned feeling responsible for others. Is that correct?
Nancy: Yes.
Mark Cameron: You know what I love about Romans 12:18? I am sure you are familiar with this verse. It says, “If possible, as much as it depends upon you, live at peace with everyone.” I love how it has to qualify it as, “if possible,” meaning that peace isn’t always possible. “As much as it depends upon you,” meaning that you are only responsible for you. You are not responsible for the consequence of her actions. Here is another simple example. If somebody is driving drunk and they are a danger and you call about them, whatever the consequence of that is, a fine or going to jail, that is not your fault. That is the law and they didn’t obey the law. You just called in as a responsible citizen, and they have to own the consequences of that. I am sure she knows that her dogs were barking 24/7, and if she doesn't deal with that, if she doesn't manage that situation, whatever the consequences are from that, because it is reasonable that someone is going to call if your dogs are barking all the time, you are not responsible for the consequences of that. There is a difference between being responsible to and being responsible for. We cannot be responsible for others; we can only be responsible for ourselves. We are responsible to others. So, for instance, even in that situation that I gave about a drunk driver, you would be responsible to other people, even if you are not on the road, to call something in if someone’s driving drunk, but you are not responsible for the other person. As you said, somebody moved in and somebody was an enabler and somebody is taking responsibility for this person so that they can continue making poor decisions, but that is not your issue. I think going in and maybe getting some therapy and learning to, one, discover how do I differentiate between the two of these things, responsible to, responsible for? How do I work out where these messages came from and how do I work that out inside of myself? Then also maybe getting some support and some help around you because you have still got to deal with this actual situation that is going on. I am sure there are other neighbors, too, who are bothered by a dog barking. I am not wanting you to form alliances against one another, but are you aware of other neighbors who also are bothered by this situation?
Nancy: Yes. The same people that are targeting me, or they stopped now so to speak, were complaining to me as well. “Her dogs make my dogs bark. Look at my arms.” This lady had like 25 bandages on her arms because the girl didn’t cut the dog’s nails. I am thinking in my head, why are you coming to me? They don't know, it is like I understand they don't know.
Mark Cameron: How are they targeting you now? What are they doing to target you?
Nancy: It is just their body language, slamming doors at their house and stuff. But after the four months, the lady moved into number one and she enabled the whole thing. They picked up dog excrement. They did everything because they claimed that--
Mark Cameron: Nancy, have you actually checked it out with your neighbors? I know you are saying that their body language and slamming doors, we all have confirmation bias, meaning that when we think we know something, we look for evidence for that.
Nancy: She came over. The lady from afar that was targeting me, her husband came down to who called the police and silly me, I should have said it is none of your business, but I am not rude. I said, “I did, because her dogs are barking.” Then his second half came down and said, “I am coming over to you,” just like that. I went in the house.
New Life: Right. But you are living under this threat now. I think the challenge is if you are in a neighborhood, as long as this goes unaddressed as a community, as a group with a mediator or some sort of neutral party, there is going to continue to be this and you have been affected. It is a lot. I would encourage you to find a neutral third party that everybody can come to with good intentions. We have to live by each other. How do we get along? How do we be able to see each other as we truly are, not from a threatening standpoint? I am so sorry this is going like this, and I know that it can be fixed. Every day, we hear from people all over the world who are looking for hope. They have been lost in a relationship struggle, addiction, anxiety, depression, all kinds of ways. Wouldn’t you love to be part of a rescue team? Don’t miss your opportunity to be part of something that changes lives every single day because every one matters. Your generosity helps find them. We have seen God work in the lives of so many people over the years here at New Life, and we want to invite you to be part of what God is doing. 99 for the 1 is our partner program that you can give to the ministry on a monthly basis to make sure that we continue to reach out to the lost. Call 1-800-NEW-LIFE or newlife.com/99for1. Join the mission. Rescue the one and restore the many. Welcome back. We are going to connect Nancy with a therapist or a coach. Sometimes in these situations, it can get bigger and bigger without a path forward, and we want to help you get there, Nancy. It is so hard, especially when it is your home. For everybody, we don't want it to be stressful. We want to be able to get along. I feel for her, and we will be praying for that situation. I also want to let you know about an event I am going to be participating in at Hope Together Conference. You can join in person in Allen, Texas, or you can join online. We are helping people who are in ministry with practical skills as well as being inspired of how we can continue to help so many people. I know that there are going to be chaplains there, there are going to be leaders from the church, as well as ministry leaders of all different shapes and sizes because our goal is that we want to bring the life of Christ into our communities, into our ministries. You can go to hopetogether.com to register, and you can use the code NLM20 to save 20 percent. I hope to see you there. We are going to go back to the phones. We are going to talk with Richard, who is calling us from Dallas, Texas. He listens on KWRD. We are glad that you called us, Richard. How can we help you today?
Richard: I am a widower. My wife died about four months ago, and I am in grief counseling. In my grief counseling class, it is a group class, there is a widow who lost her husband just a couple months before I experienced my loss. We have sort of struck up a bit of a friendship in that we talk on the phone for a long time, but we don't really have a relationship per se. However, I will say that I do have some interest in having some type of relationship with her. we have a lot of similarities about what we have been through. We were both caregivers for a long time, so we have experienced a lot of the same things. Anyway, I know that I am not done grieving for my wife yet, and I also am positive that she is not done grieving for her husband yet. I wouldn’t be adverse to establishing some sort of relationship, but I don't really know time-frame-wise and appropriateness. We have met in a grief therapy situation, so it is not necessarily a situation that you want to talk to somebody about establishing some sort of relationship. I don't really know what my next step would be if I wanted to try to cultivate a relationship. I was wondering what you guys’ opinions are on that situation.
New Life: Great question. JJ, how can we help Richard? Oh, you are on mute, JJ. Maybe that is it. Richard, I also want to extend my condolences. I am sorry about your loss, and also, I am just grateful that you are asking these questions. Mark, you can start as we wait for JJ.
Mark Cameron: I think it is very thoughtful the question that you are asking, Richard. Sorry to hear about your wife, also, by the way. It sounds like you are-- I am glad you are in a grief share group. In grief share, people do bond in their grief, and it sounds like you are bonding one on one with this person because you have a shared experience. Like you said, there is a lot of similarity between the types of grief that you are going through, both being a caregiver, so it sounds like there was this kind of long-term progression. It wasn’t something that was sudden, so there is a similarity in what you have experienced. We bond with people when there are similarities, yet as you are describing, you are both very early on in this process. This isn’t a rule, what I am going to say here, it is just guidance. I would wait at least a year. That gives you both time to kind of process what has happened, the ending of that relationship. Then I would then start, if she is interested, to build a relationship outside of the grief, too, to get to know one another. I don't know if you guys both have children, too. Sometimes it is difficult for children to--
Richard: Well, they are all grown.
Mark Cameron: Even when they are grown, I have seen this. I have seen somebody who has moved on very quickly and grown children have felt hurt by that because, again, it is that person’s choice and they have desires that make sense, but when you move on too quickly, it can be hurtful to lots of people around you. I think the biggest caution is moving on too quickly itself, not necessarily for what other people may think about it, but just caution for yourself and for her to recognize to get through a grieving period and then build a relationship after that. That is just my thoughts.
New Life: I love that, Mark, and I do think that there is kind of a rule of thumb of one year because you have a full year of experiences. JJ is back. JJ?
JJ West: I am back. I didn’t touch anything. I don’t understand. There are gremlins all over the place here. Anyway, what I was trying to say, Richard, is that I also want to express my condolences, and I agree with Mark. It is good to wait a year because it does give you a chance to go through many of the anniversaries, holidays, all of the living the new world, the new life without this significant person in your life. That is important for your own heart to grieve. I also will say this. This advice was given to me before I was married and I was dating and I was considering whether to propose, and a friend of mine said, “JJ, time has never been a detriment to a God-given relationship.” What I want you to hear in that, Richard, is you don't need to rush this. You don't need to, “Well, I better let her know how I am feeling because when the grief share group ends and I haven’t expressed that, what will happen to our relationship?” Develop a relationship outside of the grief, getting to know each other, but not jumping into another romantic relationship until you have both had the opportunity to let your hearts grieve. Otherwise, you can’t give your heart fully to someone else because your heart is still holding on to the past relationship.
New Life: Can I add one more thing, Richard?
Richard: Absolutely.
New Life: I love what both of these men have said. Communicating this with this woman is going to be very important, to say that if you are willing to do the year, I think that is very good to say to her. I also think that you have to manage the amount of connection you have in that year. If you just say a year and nothing changes, like you are talking every day for hours at a time, you might as well not have the year. Do you see what I am saying?
Richard: Yes. I think loneliness is a big factor. My general style is I don't like being lonely. I haven’t been without a companion for a very long time, and this is a very tough struggle.
Mark Cameron: That makes total sense, that you would be lonely in this moment. What I would caution you about is if you bond out of a place of insecurity in yourself, then you are going to have an insecure bond with her. That is not fair for her, and it is not fair for you, either. Manage the loneliness because then when you can build a relationship that is not based off of meeting that loneliness need, it will be a stronger, more secure relationship. The last thing I would say is check in with your kids throughout this process, too, before you start dating someone. Not that you need their permission, just check in with them. I think it is better if you can just check how everyone’s feeling about things, and then you let them know what you are about to do. Otherwise, if you jump into this relationship with her, then that may cause problems on both sides of your families.
New Life: Richard, are you involved with a church or anything outside of the home, like a men’s group or Bible study?
Richard: Yes, very much so. A small group is very supportive, and the men have really stepped up to support me.
New Life: That is excellent, and it is also part of your healing journey, that it is other men who are going to help carry this loneliness burden, to allow those feelings to surface and go on. It speaks very highly of your marriage that you are wanting to be in another relationship. At the same time, we want you to be ready so that it is not out of a lack, it is out of a fullness. We will connect you with some folks that may be able to help you along this way as well. Thank you for calling, Richard. I want to just encourage you if you are in a situation like what Richard talked about or even any-- we have been helping people find those connections to the challenges in life. One of the ways that we have been doing that is through our webinars. We have got one coming up in September, September 17th. I will be hosting with Eric Thomas, one of our clinical counselors in the network. He also serves at our Every Man’s Battle intensives. It is called From Addiction to Freedom: Biblical and Clinical Help for Lasting Recovery. We want to help you get the freedom that you want to experience, whether you are dealing with addiction or you have a loved one. It can be experienced. The freedom can be experienced. We have seen it happen so many times. This is a 90-minute webinar, and even if you can’t make it on September 17th, we will encourage you to register because there will be a replay available for the next week or so after the event. Whatever destructive habit you are facing, we can lead you to recovery. We know that recovery can help. We are going to go back to calls. We are going to talk with Stella, who is calling us from Los Angeles. She listens on the internet. We are glad that you are with us, Stella. Stella, are you here? Can you unmute? Stella may be gone. We have Dave calling us from York, Pennsylvania. He watches us on YouTube. If you are watching on YouTube, remember click like and subscribe. It helps. Dave, we want to answer your question. How can we help you today?
Dave: I have lost my faith and trust in Christianity. I am a critical thinker, and when I studied who wrote the Bible and how it was written, I told Jesus had a unique story, but come to find out 12 to 15 mythical gods copied the same story, December 25th birthday, walking on water, and on and on. I was shocked.
New Life: How can we help you, Dave? Is it distressing to you to discover these things? Is it affecting your belief?
Dave: Very discouraging. I was an altar boy at the oldest church in America, but it was all in Latin back then so it all went over my head.
Mark Cameron: In what way is it discouraging for you, Dave, to find out that there are other religions that have similarities with Christianity in those stories?
Dave: I just thought Jesus was a very unique story, and to find out it has been copied by mythical gods, changing the water into wine, dying and coming back, and on and on, I have lost my faith.
New Life: Dave, do you have anybody that is walking this journey with you, or did you just find these on your own? Are you talking with someone about it?
Dave: Not really, because I live alone in a motorhome, and there is a lot of solitude. I am being bombarded by negative things on YouTube about Christianity.
Mark Cameron: I think there is something key in what you are saying about something being copied. When something is copied, it means that there was an original that happened here. I can understand how this could feel a little bit concerning and rock the boat of your faith. For me, when I look at this, I see that there is an original. If many people across the world believe that there was a flood story, that must mean that there was likely a flood that happened one time. Whether people believe on who caused the flood or who God is, that is a different story. I think it would be a great book for you to read if you haven’t read it. It is a book called Mere Christianity by C.S. Lewis. He really starts at the beginning and starts to outline all of the evidence of philosophical and practical evidence of why he believes that there is a God, and then he moves to then why the God of Christianity makes the most sense. Have you ever read that book, Mere Christianity?
Dave: No, but I have been hearing a lot from Spinoza.
New Life: I think that is a great idea, Mark. That is a great way. I also think Dave needs to be connecting with people. You can’t do this alone. JJ, can you add anything?
JJ West: Along those same lines with Mere Christianity by C.S. Lewis, there is Basic Christianity by John Stott, which is a phenomenal work that really clearly explains why the faith is to be believed, how it has been verified. There is also a book called The New Testament Documents: Are They Reliable? by F.F. Bruce, which will help give you some clarity as to why it is reasonable to believe that what the New Testament documents say is an accurate description of what Jesus said and did. It is important that there are copies all over the place, but it is important to recognize that Jesus is unique in that he was the only one who claimed to be God. There are many who come along who say, “This is the way to find God,” but Jesus said, “I am him. I am God showing up in the flesh, and I am offering my perfect life as a sacrifice for your sin.” That is unique. We don't see that elsewhere. Continue to search, continue to learn, and as Becky was getting at this, it is important to not do this in isolation. Find a good community. Colossians tells us Paul is writing there and he says, “Who can know the mind of the Lord? But we,” corporately we, “have the mind of Christ.” Not me individually, but we corporately have the mind of Christ. I need other people in my world who can help balance the messages that I am hearing and help me critically think through them, not just on my own.
New Life: It is interesting because I just heard Dr. Curt Thompson talking about this very thing, that we are not ourselves on our own. We are part of a community, and the body of Christ, that is how we are designed. Dave, this is a great question that so many people struggle with and are fearful to ask out loud. We are grateful that you called us today and that you are asking this. I am going to send Dave a Life Recovery Bible, and I want to encourage you to do the devotionals in there. We are going to get you connected with a Life Recovery group. If you are watching on YouTube, you can connect with a group online as well. We don't want you to be alone. We want you to experience the transformation that Jesus has for you. Thank you, JJ. Thank you, Mark. We are so grateful for both of you, and thank you, listeners. Tune in next time, go to church this Sunday somewhere and serve someone somewhere. We are grateful for the opportunity to be here. Thank you for giving to help us do what we do. We will see you then. To find out more information about New Life or to order any of the resources mentioned on today’s program, call 1-800-NEW-LIFE. Now, back to New Life LIVE. Welcome back. I want to just encourage you if you are in a situation like what Richard talked about or even any-- we have been helping people find those connections to the challenges in life. One of the ways that we have been doing that is through our webinars. We have got one coming up in September, September 17th. I will be hosting with Eric Thomas, one of our clinical counselors in the network. He also serves at our Every Man’s Battle intensives. It is called From Addiction to Freedom: Biblical and Clinical Help for Lasting Recovery. We want to help you get the freedom that you want to experience, whether you are dealing with addiction or you have a loved one. It can be experienced. The freedom can be experienced. We have seen it happen so many times. This is a 90-minute webinar, and even if you can’t make it on September 17th, we will encourage you to register because there will be a replay available for the next week or so after the event. We know that whatever destructive habit you are facing, we can lead you to recovery. We know that recovery can help. We are glad that Eric’s going to join us, but it is really one of those challenges of life is finding that freedom, and we want to encourage you all along the way. We are going to go back to calls. We are going to talk with Stella, who is calling us from Los Angeles, listens on the internet. We are glad that you are with us, Stella. Stella, are you here? Can you unmute? Stella may be gone. But we are still here. I want to just go right back to what we were talking about with Richard because it can seem so cut and dried when we are not experienced the big feelings of grief, but it can be so beneficial to continue to lean into the pain so that you can get through it on the other end. I think we are not going to have Stella back, but we have Dave calling us from York, Pennsylvania. He watches us on YouTube. If you are watching on YouTube, remember click like and subscribe. It helps. But Dave, we want to answer your question. How can we help you today?
Dave: I have lost my faith and trust in Christianity. I am a critical thinker, and when I studied who wrote the Bible and how it was written, and I told Jesus had a unique story, but come to find out 12 to 15 mythical gods copied the same story. December 25th birthday, walking on water, and on and on. I was shocked.
New Life: How can we help you, Dave? Is it distressing to you to discover these things? Is it affecting your belief?
Dave: Very discouraging. I was an altar boy at the oldest church in America, but it was all in Latin back then so it all went over my head.
Mark Cameron: In what way is it discouraging for you, Dave, to find out that there are other religions that have similarities with Christianity in those stories?
Dave: I just thought Jesus was a very unique story, and to find out it has been copied by mythical gods, changing the water into wine, dying and coming back, and on and on, I have lost my faith.
New Life: Dave, do you have anybody that is walking this journey with you, or did you just find these on your own? Are you talking with someone about it?
Dave: Not really, because I live alone in a motorhome, and there is a lot of solitude. I am being bombarded by negative things on YouTube about Christianity.
Mark Cameron: I think there is something key in what you are saying about something being copied. When something is copied, it means that there was an original that happened here. I can understand how this could feel a little bit concerning and rock the boat of your faith. For me, when I look at this, I see that there is an original. If many people across the world believe that there was a flood story, that must mean that there was likely a flood that happened one time. Whether people believe on who caused the flood or who God is, that is a different story. I think it would be a great book for you to read if you haven’t read it. It is a book called Mere Christianity by C.S. Lewis. He really starts at the beginning and starts to outline all of the evidence of philosophical and practical evidence of why he believes that there is a God, and then he moves to then why the God of Christianity makes the most sense. Have you ever read that book, Mere Christianity?
Dave: No, but I have been hearing a lot from Spinoza.
New Life: I think that is a great idea, Mark. That is a great way. I also think Dave needs to be connecting with people. You can’t do this alone. JJ, can you add anything?
JJ West: I would jump right in with along those same lines with Mere Christianity by C.S. Lewis, there is Basic Christianity by John Stott, which is a phenomenal work that really clearly explains why the faith is to be believed, how it has been verified. There is also a book called The New Testament Documents: Are They Reliable? by F.F. Bruce, which will help give you some clarity as to why it is reasonable to believe that what the New Testament documents say is an accurate description of what Jesus said and did. It is important that there are copies all over the place, but it is important to recognize that Jesus is unique in that he was the only one who claimed to be God. There are many who come along who say, “This is the way to find God,” but Jesus said, “No, I am him. I am God showing up in the flesh, and I am offering my perfect life as a sacrifice for your sin.” That is unique. We don't see that elsewhere. Continue to search, continue to learn, and I think Becky was getting at this, it is important to not do this in isolation. Find a good community. Colossians tells us Paul is writing there and he says, “Who can know the mind of the Lord? But we,” corporately we, “have the mind of Christ.” Not me individually, but we corporately have the mind of Christ. I need other people in my world who can help balance the messages that I am hearing and help me critically think through them, not just on my own.
New Life: It is interesting because I just heard Dr. Curt Thompson talking about this very thing, that we are not ourselves on our own. We are part of a community, and the body of Christ, that is how we are designed. Dave, this is a great question that so many people struggle with and are fearful to ask out loud. We are grateful that you called us today and that you are asking this. I want to send Dave a Life Recovery Bible, and I want to encourage you to do the devotionals in there. We are going to get you connected with a Life Recovery group. If you are watching YouTube, you can connect with a group online as well. We don't want you to be alone. We want you to experience the transformation that Jesus has for you. Thank you, JJ. Thank you, Mark. We are so grateful for both of you, and thank you, listeners. Tune in next time, go to church this Sunday somewhere and serve someone somewhere. We are grateful for the opportunity to be here. Thank you for giving to help us do what we do. We will see you then. Thanks so much for listening. We hope something you heard will help you live in freedom today. If this content was helpful for you, we would love it if you would take a minute, leave a review, post about it, and rate it. Remember, we have resources and workshops online for you as you continue your journey. Go to newlife.com to find out more information. Thank you for being part of the New Life community. We know that God desires all of us to live a life of wholeness and healing, and we are so glad that you are here.